BBC Wales Drama, BBC One and Hartswood Films announce Sherlock, a contemporary remake of the Arthur Conan Doyle classic, starring Benedict Cumberbatch (Starter For Ten, Stuart A Life Backwards) as the new Sherlock Holmes and Martin Freeman (The Office, Hot Fuzz) as his loyal friend, Doctor John Watson.

Rupert Graves (God On Trial, Midnight Man) plays Inspector Lestrade.

The drama is co-created by the amazing partnership of Steven Moffat (Doctor Who, Coupling) and Mark Gatiss (The League Of Gentlemen, Doctor Who, Crooked House) and produced by Sue Vertue (Coupling, The Cup).

Strictly speaking, I should be catching upon all my other TV postings.

Like the Robin Hood Series 1 re-watch, which I'm now dreadfully behind on.

Or Ashes to Ashes, which while it looks like being a grower rather than an instant smash like Life on Mars, is still 45-mins a week of Gene, glorious Gene.

Or Torchwood, and how it's gone all RH in the 'ropey but endearing first series/ sexay mental FUN second series' sense.

But no!

I'm posting to tell you to watch Being Human on BBC3 at 9.30pm tonight. Because Russell Tovey is in it. Playing a geeky werewolf. The Radio Times says he's brilliant in it, The Mirror seems rather keen too. And in last month's Attitude, he promised arse shots. Plus, if enough of us watch it, it might get comissioned as a series, and more Russell Tovey on TV is, by its very definition, of the win.

Mention of Russell inevitably turns my thoughts to Eleven/Alonso, shimmering away enticingly on the horizon. People, I need help here. This thing, this potentially beautiful thing which in all probability will never happen has EATED MAH BRAINZ. It's got to the stage where if it doesn't happen, I intend to become a mad scientist and create a parallel universe in which it did.

I've already decided they're not allowed to do a full on Torchwood/DW crossover until Harry's got the keys to the TARDIS, because then we can have:

Team Torchwood all train their guns on the door behind which Tosh's little-machine-that-goes-ping has detected rift activity/alien beasties etc

Door opens to reveal Eleven and Alonso. The latter respectfully removes his hat in the presence of the ladies.

Eleven: Jack!

Jack: Doctor?!

Gwen/Owen/Tosh: That's your doctor??

Alonso (to Eleven): You have to stop meeting people like this.

And then watch Ianto go into QUIP OVERDRIVE.

'OK, Humbert Humbert, where'd you meet him, waiting outside his playground with a bag of Werthers Originals?'

Not only that, my subconscious has decreed that their first ‘Coming Soon’ entire-series trailer will be edited to The Beginning of the Twist by The Futureheads. Admittedly I think everything sounds better edited to The Futureheads, but seriously – Have a listen to that and tell me it wouldn’t go with footage of Harry and Russell legging it like mental while pursued by grotty horrid nastiness of the third kind.

Besides, the first verse mentions kissing.

I need many years of therapy.

To: Shithead in Canning Town

From: Zan

Re: Cloning my debit card

Memo:

Thank you <i>so</i> much for splurging £100 on Oyster cards with my money on the day I'd already gone over my overdraft limit by my own sweet self you UTTER UTTER TOSSER.

And they can't stop that payment from coming out of my account on Friday, thus giving me a further THREE DAYS OF OVERDRAFT CHARGES, nor can they guarantee I'll get those charges back when they've finished determining that I haven't made you up. ASSHAT.

My TV boyfriend has an axe, you know.



*cries*

Ha, so I disappear for half the year and then turn up waffling about Robin Hood – that’s gonna confuse a few of my flisters from way back when.

It has to be done though because I am still in a state of EXTREME HEADFUCK from last night’s series 2 finale, so to soothe my fevered mind I have made me a list of reasons for why WILL AND DJAQ MUST RETURN IN SERIES 3 DAMNIT. Which I should point out for those of a sensitive disposition does contain one not only humungously spoilery but also slightly flippant reference to The Big Event at the end. For which I mean no offence, honest…

Arrgh, I've not started a new journal since 2002, I've forgotten how to do it. Well, this is me at the moment:


THIS WEEK ZAN IS MOSTLY:

Thinking about - my job

Listening to - 'It Will Find You' - Maps

Reading - job ads

Watching - Doctor Who, Kingdom, Desperate Housewives

Perving over - Dan Stevens in Maxwell on Beeb 2 on Friday. The only thing nicer than Dan Stevens in a well-cut suit is Dan Stevens out of a well-cut suit. And if the removal of the well-cut suit is in order to cavort with other pretties, so much the better. (Mental note - need In The Line Of Beauty on DVD)

Laughing at - Chelsea. Sorry Chelsea fans, but it has to be done.

Geeking for - Spidey 3, which I'm seeing in an hour's time. I know the reviews have been mixed but it can't be more of a disappointment than X-men 3, surely?

Squeeing over - the Coming Up trailer on last night's Doctor Who, because GeraldHoranJack'sBackScaryScarecrowsJack'sBackScreamingGlowyEyesAmnesia!DoctorJack'sBackHasMarthaTurloughedHerselfJack'sBackExplosionsSpaceJack'sBackWasn'tThatHisSpaceSuitFromSatanPit?
Jack'sBackVideoLink!DoctorJack'sBackDerekJacobiJACK.IS.BACK.JohnSimmJohnSimmJohnFUCKINGSimmWithTheSinisterSmilingAndTheOxygenMask
AndTheTappingAndTheOHMYSQUEETASTICGOD.

There must and shall be Tennant/Barrowman/Simm TARDIS!filth. I decree it.

‘Come to the edge.’ 

‘We are afraid.’ 

‘Come to the edge.’ 

‘We might fall.’ 

‘Come to the edge.’ 

And they came. 

And he pushed them. 

And they flew.